In business and in life, we have to deal with all types of people like it or not.
I think one of the most challenging yet rewarding parts of being an entrepreneur is that I am forced on a daily basis to grow, improve my EQ, suck it up, eat s***, and break past my personal limitations.
I am constantly trying to expand my threshold of what I can tolerate while simultaneously learning to drop or avoid people or situations that can negatively impact me or my business.
Learning to walk that tightrope of figuring out what you need to learn to deal with and what you need to stop putting up with is, perhaps, the greatest challenge of all.
I thought it would be a fun little exercise to draw up a list of traits and behaviors I can’t stand.
I’m not sure yet what constructive purpose this exercise serves, but it does help me identify the things that trigger me negatively and it felt good to get it all out on paper.
This list might also help me learn to watch out for these traits or become more patient and accepting when people display them. Maybe it will help me become more tolerant of people who exhibit these traits and learn who or what to avoid as well (in a business partner, romantic partner, client, friend etc.)
There is a belief that if something annoys you, you might have a little bit of that trait within yourself. Sometimes, that’s precisely the reason why it bothers you so much. If anything, this list can work as a mirror on myself help keep me in check so I can steer clear of being guilty of these behaviors.
It can also help me get a bird’s eye view on what annoys me so that I can grow as a person and learn to work with people who exhibit these traits. Some of these things are negotiable in some situations, but not in others.
In life and in business you have no choice but to deal with the good, the bad, the ugly, and the boring. While one thing might be intolerable in a friendship, you just might have to eat it in a business situation. And sometimes you need to know where to draw the line — even with clients and customers.
Without further adieu, if you really want to get under my skin in a bad way, here’s how to do it:
- Unsolicited advice
- Double standards
- Not owning up or taking responsibility for one’s actions
- Holier-than-thou attitudes
- Whining and excessive complaining (kvetching)
- Sense of entitlement
- Life-coaches with no real life experience or who are horrible at managing their own lives or business coaches who haven’t built a real business
- Judging unfavorably
- Attempts to control or silence me
- Sticklers about petty or insignificant rules or other matters
- Putting ideology or religion before fellow human beings
- Social media complaining
- People who talk over others
- Being judged as bad because you curse or pepper your everyday speech with a little profanity here and there
- Empty talk (e.g. talks of plans or things you’re going to do or things we are going to do together with no real effort to carry them out)
- Asking for something without establishing a rapport or relationship first e.g. “Hi, nice to meet you. Are you interested in buying x?”
- Interruptive advertising or solicitation
- People who get angry at you when you’re under 3 minutes late (3-minute rule?)
- People who get upset with you when you can’t talk to them the at moment they want to talk to you
- Long, boring talks and speeches
- Unscheduled phone calls from anyone who isn’t family or a close friend
- Not allowing me to make my point or counterargument after you just went off on me
- Unjustified self aggrandizement
- Ad hominem attacks which attack character rather than ideas
- Arguments where the speaker/writer mistakes their own subjective opinion for fact when they are factually incorrect
- Being judged by an unfair standard or one that the other person doesn’t hold for themselves
- Taking advantage of others
- People who will inevitably judge me in an unfavorable light for posting this list or call me out even though we all have a “list” and we are all guilty of judging others negatively at times, sometimes for behaviors we ourselves are guilty of, but most of us aren’t bold enough to talk about it or share it with the world
There are probably more and they may range from the comical slight annoyance to the intolerable, non-negotiable.
Do any of the things above annoy you too? Are you working on changing that and becoming more flexible on any of them? Do you exhibit any of these tendencies yourself?
What traits and behaviors are on your personal list of things that annoy you? Is your list too long? If your list is short, are you truly being honest with yourself? Are you guilty of some of the very things that you don’t like and how are you going to work on that?
Are any of the things on your list negotiable or would you put up with them if the situation calls for it?
Feel free to let me know in the comments!